You know you’re South African when….: Facebook group

by Philip on September 19, 2007

by Philip | September 19th, 2007  

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Facebook has really taken off in South Africa, in the same way that Brazil took to Orkut..In droves.

This group
has a nice list, highlighting some endearing (and some not) South Africans idiosyncrasies.

Please note the crime references in this list pertain mainly to Johannesburg :)

You know you’re South African when:

    * You call a bathing suit a “swimming costume”

    * You call a traffic light a “robot”

    * The employees dance in front of the building to show how unhappy they are

    * The SABC advertises and shows highlights of the program you just finished watching

    * You get cold easily. Anything below 16 degrees Celsius is Arctic weather

    * You know what Rooibos Tea is, even if you’ve never had any

    * You can sing your national anthem in four languages, and you have no idea what it means in any of them

    * You know someone who knows someone who has met Nelson Mandela

    * You go to “braais” (barbecues) regularly, where you eat boerewors (long meaty sausage- type thing) and swim, sometimes simultaneously

    * You know that there’s nothing to do in the Free State

    * You produce a R100 note instead of your driver’s license when stopped by a traffic officer

    * You can do your monthly shopping on the pavement

    * You have to hire a security guard whenever you park your car

    * You can count the national soccer team’s scores with no fingers

    * To get free electricity you have to pay a connection fee of R750

    * Hijacking cars is a profession

    * You can pay your tuition fees by holding up a sign at a traffic light

    * The petrol in your tank may be worth more than your car

    * More people vote in a local reality TV show than in a local election

    * People have the most wonderful names: Chris tmas, Goodwill, Pretty, Wednesday,

    Blessing, Brilliant, Gift, Precious, Innocence and Given

    * “Now now” can mean anything from a minute to a month

    * You continue to wait after a traffic light has turned to green to make way for taxis traveling in the opposite direction

    * Traveling at 120 km/h you’re the slowest vehicle on the highway

    * You’re genuinely and pleasantly surprised whenever you find your car parked where you left it

    * A bullet train is being introduced, but we can’t fix potholes

    * The last time you visited the coast you paid more in speeding fines and toll fees than you did for the entire holiday

    * You paint your car’s registration on the roof

    * You have to take your own linen with you if you are admitted to a government hospital

    * You have to prove that you don’t need a loan to get one

    * Prisoners go on strike

    * You don’t stop at a red traffic light, in case somebody hijacks your car

    * You consider it a good month if you only get mugged once

    * Rwandan refugees start leaving the country because the crime rate is too high

    * When 2 Afrikaans TV programs are separated by a Xhosa announcement of the following Afrikaans program, and a Zulu ad

    * You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from SA


    South African sayings.. and definitions!

    A

    1. Ag-ja (pronounced: ‘ach*-yaa’) – Sure

    2. Aikona! (pronounced: ‘Eye-kawn-uh) – No!

    3. Amped – Excited

    4. Arvie – Afternoon

    5. Amabhokobhoko (pronounced: ‘Um-muh-baw-kaw-baw-kaw’) / Springboks – South African national rugby side

    6. Amaglug-glug (pronounced: ‘Um-muh-glue-glue-g’) – SASOL; South African under 20 football side

    7. Amajita (pronounced: ‘Um-muh-jee-tuh’) – Guys

    ———————————————————————–

    B

    8. Babbalas (pronounced: ‘Bubble-us’) – Hangover

    9. Baggies – Boardshorts

    10. Bakkie (pronounced: ‘buck-key’) – Pick-up truck

    11. Ballie (pronounced: ‘b-ul-lee) – Old person

    12. Bankie – Bank bag filled with dope

    13. Bell – To phone someone

    14. Biltong (pronounced: ‘bill-tong’) – Jerky

    15. Bioscope – Movies

    16. Bleak – Disappointed

    17. Biscuit – Term of affection (i.e. Timmy, you biscuit!) / Cookie

    18. Blaps (pronounced: ‘blups’) – Mistake

    19. Bliksem (pronounced: ‘blik-sum’) – (Exclamation – similar to ‘Jislaaik’)/ To hit.

    20. Blind – Embarrassing

    21. Bob – Money

    22. Boerewors (pronounced: ‘boo-re-vors’) – Sausage

    23. Boet – (Term of affection) Friend

    24. Bog – Toilet

    25. Bokkie (pronounced: ‘baw-key’) – Girl/woman

    26. Boomie (‘boom-me’) / Boomelaar (‘boom-eh-laa-r’) – Homeless person

    27. Boot – Trunk

    28. Box – Television

    29. Braai (pronounced: ‘br-eye) – Barbeque

    30. Bru – Friend/person

    31. Bundu – Wilderness

    32. Bunny Chow – Curry inside a loaf of bread

    Bossies – Crazy/Mad
    ———————————————————————–

    C

    33. Café (pronounced: ‘caf-fee’) – Corner store (pronunciation is most important)

    34. Carrots – To get screwed

    35. Charf – Joke / Flirt

    36. Charles – Castle Lager (Beer)

    37. Check – Look

    38. Checkers – Plastic carrier bag

    39. Cherrie – Woman

    40. Cheers – Thanks / Good-bye

    41. China – Friend

    42. Chips – Look out / A warning / French fries / Crisps

    43. Chocolate / Chocolate bar – R20 note

    44. Chop – Moron

    45. Chorb – Pimple

    46. Chorrie (pronounced: ‘Chore-ree’) – Car

    47. Cotch – Vomit

    48. Circle – Roundabout

    49. Classic – Awesome / excellent

    50. Clipper – R100 note

    51. Coke / Cream Soda – Leaded or Unleaded petrol (refers to the colour coding at the petrol station)

    52. Connection – Person (Can be a friend or a vaguely related person)

    53. Cool drink – Soda

    54. Crash – Sleep

    55. Cubby hole – Glove compartment

    Chuffed – happy/proud

    Chunder – puke/vomit
    ———————————————————————–

    D

    56. Dagga (pronounced: ‘duh-ch*-uh’) – Marijuana

    57. De Klerk – R2 coin

    58. Deck – Punch

    59. Deurmekaar (pronounced: ‘dee-yer-mek-car’) – Confused

    60. Dinges (pronounced: ‘ding-us’) – Thing

    61. Dodgy – Suspiscious

    62. Doss (pronounced: ‘daws’) – Sleep

    63. Duck – Leave

    64. Disco Biscuit – Ecstasy tablet

    65. Dish – Satellite TV dish

    66. Doek (pronounced: like ‘book’ but with a ‘d’) – Scarf worn on the head (like a bandana) / cloth

    67. Dof (pronounced: ‘dawf’) – Dumb

    68. Dolphin – BMW

    69. Donga – Ditch

    70. Dosh – Cash

    71. Dummy – Pacifier

    (Doos -Box)
    ———————————————————————–

    E

    72. Eina! (pronounced: ‘ay-nah’!) – Ouch

    73. Eish! – Exclamation / confessing confusion

    ———————————————————————–

    F

    74. Flossie (pronounced: ‘Flaw-sea’) – Girlfriend

    75. Fong-Kong – Fake

    76. Foofy slide – Zip Line

    77. Full on – Absolutely

    78. Fully – Yes

    79. Funagalore (pronounced: ‘Fun-nah-galore’) – Mixture of South African languages

    ———————————————————————–

    G

    80. Gaai (pronounced: ‘ch*-eye’) – Nothing

    81. Gafoefel (pronounced: ‘ch*-uh-foo-fill’) – To fidget with / To fool around with

    82. Ganja (pronounced: ‘Gun-juh’) – Marijuana

    83. Gatvol (pronounced: ‘ch*-ut-fol’) – Fed Up

    84. Gogga (pronounced: ‘ch*-aw-ch*-uh’) – Insect

    85. Goof – Swim

    86. Goofed – Stoned

    87. Gooi (pronounced: ‘ch*-oy’) – Throw / To vomit

    88. Graft – Hard work

    89. Grammadoelas (pronounced: ‘ch*-ramma-do-lus) – Wilderness

    90. Granadilla – Passion Fruit

    91. Guff – Fart

    ———————————————————————–

    H

    92. Hayibo! (pronounced: ‘hi-baw’) – (Exclamation/Surprise) Wow!)

    93. Half and half – Half brandy, half coke drink

    94. Half-tiger – R5 coin

    95. Hap (prounounced: ‘Hup’) – Bite of

    96. Hectic – Extreme

    97. Heita! (pronounced: ‘ay-tah’) – Hi!

    98. Higher grade – Reference to our schooling system and is usually used in a derogatory sense when a task is too complex for someone (i.e. China, it’s not that higher grade, just do it!)

    99. Hone – Stink

    100. Hooter – Car horn

    101. Hose – Laugh

    102. Howzit! – Hi!

    ———————————————————————–

    I

    103. Izzit / Is it? (pronounced: ‘zawl’) – Oh really?!

    ———————————————————————–

    J

    104. Jags (prounounced: ‘yuch*-s’) – Horny

    105. Ja-nee (pronounced: ‘yaa’ ‘knee-ya’) – Equivalent of ‘I don’t know’ / sure

    106. Jawelnofine (pronounced: ‘yaa’ ‘well’ ‘no’ ‘fine’) – (Response) Alright

    107. Jeet – Leave

    108. Jislaaik (pronounced: ‘yis-like’) – Holy Crap!

    109. Johnnie Walker – Someone who doesn’t own a car

    110. Jol (pronounced: ‘Jawl’) – Party

    111. Juice – Petrol

    112. Just now – Later

    ———————————————————————–

    K

    113. Kak – crap

    114. Kief (pronounced: ‘keef’) – Cool/awesome

    115. Koki (pronounced: ‘Coke-key’) – Permanent marker

    116. Kombi – Minibus / Small van

    117. Koppie (pronounced: ‘kaw-pea’) – Small hill / small person’s head

    118. Kreepy / Kreepy Krawly – Pool skimmer

    119. Kugel (pronounced: ‘Coo-gill’) – Posh women

    120. Kwaai (pronounced: “kw-eye’) – Cool

    121. Kwaito (pronounced: ‘kw-eye-toe’) – Township Music

    ———————————————————————–

    L

    122. Laduma! (pronounced: ‘La-doom-a’!) – Scoring a goal in football

    123. Laaitie (pronounced: ‘light-tea’) – Child

    124. Lank – A lot

    125. Lappie (pronounced: ‘lupp-pea’) – Cloth

    126. Larny – Fancy OR Person/friend (i.e. Howzit my larny?!)

    127. Lekker – Cool/awesome

    128. Location – Informal settlement

    129. Lus (pronounced: ‘lis’) – Craving

    ———————————————————————–

    M

    130. Madiba (pronounced: ‘muh-dee-buh’) – Nelson Mandela (affectionate reference)

    131. Mampara (pronounced: ‘Mum-puh-ruh’) – Fool

    132. Marmite – South African equivalent of Australian’s Vegemite

    133. Matchbox – Typical township house

    134. Matric – Final year of high school

    135. Meerkat (pronounced: ‘me-yer-kat’) – Mongoose

    136. Metro – Traffic officers

    137. Mielie (pronounced: ‘me-lee’) – Corn

    138. Mif – Disgusting / upset

    139. Mission – Awesome / Difficult

    140. Moegoe (pronounced: ‘Moo-ch*-oo’) – Idiot / Someone who farts in the bath and then smells it! (Well that’s what I know it as … could be wrong! LOL).

    141. Moffie (pronounced: ‘maw-fee’) – Homosexual

    142. Moja (pronounced: ‘Maw-juh’) – Good (derived from ‘Mojo’)

    143. Muti (pronounced: ‘Moo-tea’) – Medicine

    Mal – Crazy
    ———————————————————————–

    N

    144. Naartjie (pronounced: ‘naar-chee’) – Tangerine

    145. Nappy – Diaper

    146. Né? (pronounced: ‘neh’) – hey?

    147. Niks – Nothing (Afrikaans) / Not (i.e. Niks … I’m not getting the door!)

    148. Nine-Nine – Straight (i.e. I told him nine-nine!)

    149. Nooit (pronounced: ‘noyt’) – Never (usually used as an exclamation)

    150. Now now – Soon

    ———————————————————————–

    O

    151. Oke (pronounced: ‘Oak’) – Person

    152. Ola / Ola 7 (pronounced: ‘Aw-la’ ‘seven’) – Hi!

    153. One Wiper – Mercedes Benz

    Outoppies – Parents

    ———————————————————————–

    P

    154. Packet – Carrier bag

    155. Pap (pronounced: ‘Pup’) – Porridge / Flat (i.e. My car’s tyre went pap)

    156. Parktown Prawn – King cricket

    157. Pavement – Sidewalk

    158. Pavement pizza – Vomit

    159. Pavement special – Mongrel dog

    160. Phuza (pronounced: ‘Poo-zuh’) – To drink

    161. Piss-cat – Heavy drinker

    162. Plakkies (pronounced: ‘pluck-keys’) – Flip-flops

    163. Pomp (pronounced: ‘pawmp’) – To have sex

    164. Pondo (pronounced: ‘Pawn-daw’) – R2 (derived from £ (Pound) – but from back in the day when it was ACTUALLY R2 to a Pound!)

    165. Pozzie (pronounced: ‘pozz-zee’) – House

    166. Pull in! – Come around!

    Padkos – Travel food
    ———————————————————————–

    Q

    Quart – 750ml of beer

    ———————————————————————–

    R

    167. Raboebie (pronounced: ‘ra-boob-bie’) – Spiderman

    168. Robot – Traffic light

    169. Rock up – Arrive

    170. Rods – Underwear (briefs)

    171. Rooibos (pronounced: ‘Roy-bos’) – Tea

    ———————————————————————–

    S

    172. Safe – Cool/awesome

    173. Samoosa (pronounced: ‘sum-moose-uh’) – Triangular Indian snack

    174. Sarmi (pronounced: ‘saar-me’) – Sandwich

    175. Sat (pronounced: ‘Sut’) – Tired/dead

    176. Scale – To steal / To jump over

    177. Shame – Used normally but also a term of sympathy (i.e. Ag shame, he’s so cute!)

    178. Sharp – Fine / Great

    179. Shongololo (pronounced: ‘shawng-gaw-law-law) – Millipede

    180. Shot – Thanks

    181. Shweet – Cool/awesome

    182. Sif – Disgusting

    183. Skat (pronounced: ‘skut’) – Term of affection. I.e. Don’t worry, my skat

    184. Skedonk – Battered old car

    185. Skinner – Gossip

    186. Skollie (pronounced: ‘skol-lee’) – Riff-raff

    187. Skop, skiet, en donner (pronounced: ‘skawp’, ‘skeet’, en ‘dawn-ner’) – Fighting

    188. Skraal (pronounced: ‘skraa-l’) – Hungry/thin

    189. Skyf (pronounced: ‘Skafe’) – Cigarette

    190. Slap chips (pronounced: ‘slup’ ‘chips’) – French fries

    191. Slip slops – Flip flops (we just had to go and be different!)

    192. S.M.S. – Text Message

    193. Smaak (prounounced: ‘smaark’) – To like/love

    194. Smiri-miri (pronounced: ‘Sm-i-ree’ ‘Mi-ree’) – Smirnoff Vodka

    195. Snackwich – A toasted sandwich with an assortment of fillings

    196. Snollie (pronounced: ‘Snol-lee’) – Snot

    197. Sosatie (pronounced: ‘Soss-sartie’) – Kebab on a stick

    198. Space Case – Pencil Bag

    199. Spanspek (pronounced: ‘Spun-speck’) – Cantaloupe

    200. Spaza – Corner café

    201. Spook and Diesel – Spirits (usually cane) and Coke

    202. Squatter camp – Informal settlement

    203. Squif (pronounced: ‘Skwif’) – Skew

    204. Starter Pack – Entry-level car (especially a Toyota ‘Tazz’)

    205. Stick (i.e. To ‘stick’ someone) – To sponsor/compensate someone money. Example: ‘Let’s go have lunch, I’ll stick you’

    206. Stiffy – 3 ½ inch floppy disk

    207. Stina (pronounced: ‘Stee-nuh’) – R1000 (translated from the Afrikaans ‘baksteen’ meaning ‘Brick’)

    208. Stokies (pronounced: ‘stow-keys’) – Slippers

    209. Sucker – Lollipop

    210. Swak – Bad

    211. Swimming Costume – Bathing Suit

    Spliff – Joint

    Skaam – embarresed
    (can aslo mean shame, ie ‘He has no skaam’)

    ———————————————————————–

    T

    212. Takkies – Sneakers

    213. Taxi – Minibus

    214. Tiger – R10

    215. Tjommie (pronounced: ‘chom-me’) – Friend

    216. Tomato Sauce – Ketchup

    217. Toppie (pronounced: ‘tawp-pee’) – Old person

    218. Torch – Flashlight

    219. Trek – Walk / Journey

    220. Tsotsi – Gangster

    221. Tune (pronounced: ‘Choon’) – I’m telling you / warning you

    222. Two Tiger – R20

    ———————————————————————–

    U

    ———————————————————————–

    V

    223. Veld – Wilderness

    224. Vienna – Hotdog sausages/’Wieners’

    225. Voetsek! (pronounced: ‘foot-sack’) – (Derogatory) Go Away!

    226. Volksie (pronounced: ‘fawlk-see’) – Volkswagen (usually a ‘Golf’)

    227. Vrot (pronounced: ‘frawt’) – Stale (i.e. food past its expiry date) / Disgusting / Weak (i.e. My car is vrot!)

    Vetkoek – (Pronounced fet-cook) deep fried bread dough… either eaten sweet with jam or savoury with mince
    ———————————————————————–

    W

    228. Walala Wasala (pronounced: ‘Wuh-laa-luh’ ‘Wuh-saa-luh’) – You snooze you lose!

    Waai – leave/go

    ———————————————————————–

    X

    ———————————————————————–

    Y

    229. Yebo (pronounced: ‘yeah-baw’) – Yes

    230. Yoh! / Yoh, yoh, yoh! (pronounced: ‘yaw’) – Expression of amazement (i.e. Yoh, I don’t believe it!)

    ———————————————————————-
    -
    Z
    -

    Zol – Marijuana

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