The monsignors of local soccer were served something new with their morning chocolate over the weekend: the silver salvers presented to them carried not only the cups of thick, black, sweet, frothy liquid that sustains them through their difficult days of lounging around, but also, next to the chocolate, a shot of hot lead, weighing down a handwritten salutation from Sepp Blatter.
“Please enjoy with my compliments,” the notes read. “Yours, Sepp.”
And the monsignors duly drank their hot lead, mustering sickly smiles afterwards and commenting on how good it was, and how much they all enjoyed the friendship of that prince of a man, Sepp.
What on Earth is SA Logue talking about? Why, Mr. Blatter’s comments over the weekend, regarding the bribery scandal currently rocking Italian soccer.
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“It’s terrible what’s happening, especially for the game’s image,” Blatter told an Italian newspaper. “I could understand it if it had happened in Africa, but not in Italy.”
That’s a true quote, from a man who, elsewhere, has expressed concern over racism in Germany in the run up to the close-at-hand World Cup, and who more or less owes his position as head of FIFA to the votes of the many southern hemisphere nations whose support he enjoys, including most of the aforesaid Africa.
Blatter’s delicate diplomacy didn’t receive much play locally, doubtless for the same reason that the monsignors drank their hot lead: he’s the boss (in an African Big Man sort of way, one might mischeviously add), and so can say and do whatever he likes, and doesn’t take kindly to critical coverage from within his various fiefdoms. (Fifadoms?)
That’s why, in future, SA Logue will be reporting to you from Mongolia, where there’s no soccer (or so SA Logue is given to understand).